HEY, IT'S BLACK FRIDAY.

THE OFFICIAL HEY BINX BLACK FRIDAY BREAKDOWN

Black Friday is upon us, and at Hey Binx, we’ve decided to throw out the rulebook, and light it on fire, naturally. Below is your hour-by-hour guide to the most aggressively unhinged sale we’ve ever attempted, complete with disclaimers, instructions, and guardrails (our attorneys insisted, lame, we know).

12:01 AM – 5:59 AM EST — BUY 1 GET 1 FREE

The sale kicks off with the kind of deal you wake up and question in the morning.
Buy one Hey Binx and get another one completely free.

If we sell out:
This applies to pre-orders, too. If the product disappears from the site like your ex after tax season, don’t panic. We will still honor the BOGO for anyone checking out during this window.

6:00 AM – 9:00 AM EST — 40% OFF + WE MAIL A LETTER TO YOUR CRUSH OR ENEMY

This is where things get weird. Beautiful. Chaotic.
At checkout, you’ll have the option to turn us into your personal postal agent.

How to Submit Your Letter Request

1. Add your Hey Binx items to cart (obviously).
2. In your cart, locate the “Add a note to your order” section.
3. Include the following information clearly:
   1. Recipient’s full name
   2. Recipient’s address
   3. Who they are (crush, enemy, situationship, boss, your mom’s neighbor who parks terribly, etc.)
   4. Subject matter / tone you want us to send
      1. Sweet?
      2. Spicy?
      3. Confessional?
      4. Mild emotional torment (within legal limits)?
   5. Wanna leave the letter anonymous? Just let us know and we will. 

Boundaries (Our Lawyers Require These, ugh soOOoOo lame)

1. Recipient must be 21+
2. We cannot send anything hateful, harmful, threatening, defamatory, or wishing ill will
3. We can call them a twat, dumbass, or disappointment to the family, but only in a playful, non-illegal, holiday-spirited way
4. We reserve the right to reject any request that goes too dark for our legal team 
5. We will write and ship the letter within 5 business days of your order

Letters will be handwritten or typed depending on which team member writes them. Some of us don't know how to spell. 

9:01 AM – 1:00 PM EST — 30% OFF + A FREE lil SPOON KEY CHAIN

Calm down.
It’s literally a tiny metal spoon for stirring your Hey Binx.
Collectible. Chic. Mischievous. Nostalgic.
(And in case anyone asks: It is not drug paraphernalia. It’s a novelty stirrer.)

Sellout Policy:
If we run out of spoons, we will still send them to you on pre-order.
We keep our promises...even the stupid ones.

1:01 PM – 5:00 PM EST — 20% OFF

This is the most normal portion of the day.
Nothing feral. Nothing extra. Just a straight 20% off your order.

Still applies to pre-orders if stock disappears.

5:01 PM – 11:59 PM EST — WE RAISE THE PRICES (YES, REALLY)

Listen. We are tired.
We’ve been awake for 17 hours, coding discounts, replying to DMs, handwriting letters to your crush, and spoon-packing with questionable ethics.

So for the last chunk of Black Friday:

We are raising prices. You will pay more.

This is your punishment for not shopping earlier. Will we lower prices again?

Yes.
Eventually.
We just don’t know when. Could be days. Could be months. Could be when Mercury leaves retrograde. Nobody knows.

GENERAL DISCLAIMERS

All discounts apply to in-stock and pre-order items as long as you check out within the stated time windows.

Must be 21+ to purchase and/or to submit letter recipients - recipients must be 21+

No hate mail, threats, death wishes, slurs, legal liabilities, or incitements of anything illegal.

We reserve the right to soften, reword, or completely rewrite your letter request if it endangers our reputation, your safety, or our attorney’s sanity.

Free lil spoon is for stirring, display, and general mischief. Not for drugs.

Raised-price period is intentional. Do not email us asking why — you’ve been warned.

Pricing will return to normal at an undisclosed future time once we feel emotionally stable.

FINAL WORD

This Black Friday is messy, dramatic, and perfectly on-brand for Hey Binx.
Set alarms, take screenshots, warn your group chat, and pray for our operations team.

love ya and good luck, 
The Hey Binx Team